December 19, 2018
Interrupting the Predictable
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Too often we find ourselves in situations where the desired outcomes differ from what we expect, leaving us feeling disappointed, upset, and frustrated. For example, that awesome prospect turns out to be a waste of time. That much wanted and earned promotion goes to someone else or becomes unavailable. The deal you’ve been working on for months gets canceled at the eleventh hour. The merger falls apart when it was a no-brainer, done deal. The sale that was “a guarantee” ends up being canceled. Do you ever ask yourself why? Seriously. Authentically. Honestly. WHY? Do you? Let’s take a closer look, let’s explore this situation or as many of you would say “dilemma/problem”.
The so-called surprises that I mentioned above are not really surprises. If you look closely, they were all predictable. Wait…What do you mean predictable? - but we had no control over the outcome! Sure you didn’t (sarcasm). I bet it’s not the first time you’re saying that you had “no control”, “it’s not your fault”. So yes, the outcomes above were predictable and here is WHY. Because of the way we operate, function, & communicate has been the same for too long. Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is INSANITY, Albert Einstein said. Yet we are expecting a different outcome every time. All of the results we’re getting in business, careers, and life are correlated with the actions we’re constantly taking. And I’m willing to bet that your actions have been more or less the same or a variation of the same/similar approach for as long as you can remember. That’s why your outcomes are predictable.
Sure you’ve tried different, new things, techniques, read motivational books, self-help books, got more education, training, listened to podcasts, etc. Yet your approach has been consistent, similar or same. It actually works too, but up to a certain point - I call it RESISTANCE. It becomes your limiting factor for what’s available NEXT. That NEXT LEVEL of PERFORMANCE that has everything you want but you currently don’t have yet. And you really want it, and maybe even deserve it, but somehow it’s out of your reach. That’s why these outcomes are predictable.
See, we [people] are creatures of habit. If something works, we don’t change anything. If something doesn’t work, we try to make changes. We make changes to ourselves. We try to make other people make changes. Unfortunately, the so-called changes typically don’t lead to any transformative, lasting results. And I’m saying it not just to say it, I’ve actually tried it myself, put myself through a rollercoaster of life with a blindfold on. I made changes to myself continuously (at least that's what I thought:)), I acquired new knowledge and skills, studied various sciences and subjects, learned new languages, read many books and countless articles, listened to podcasts and put new concepts to work, experienced cultures and lived in different countries.
And there I was, just like you EXPECTING to have a sale, close a deal, win a client, get the approval of peers, parents, find the right partner in life, choose the right career. Expecting only to get rejected, to take a misstep, to make a wrong choice, to get lost, for things to go sideways, to be so close but just not enough. So, naturally, following such experiences I would make more changes, adding new layers of skills, tips, ideas, etc. But all those changes had one common factor: they were all based on my EXPERIENCE. So when similar situations arose again - my outcomes were still more or less the same: not what I expected, not enough, not a real breakthrough. See...Operating from the domain of “my experience” made things predictable. In other words, I was coming from what I already knew, learned, did, tried. No matter what changes I made, the results didn’t differ dramatically and did not last. Then I realized that trying to make all these changes on the surface, while my core remained the same, was not going to give me the results that I wanted. So I transformed the core. That’s right, transformed, (not simply changed) and my predictable future has been interrupted. I actually get to write and create my own future, without the past holding me back and dragging me down.
If you look at your life, your career, your business right here right now, chances are you already know exactly how things are going to go and how things are not going to go. The way you are today already has your future written, !make no doubt about that! And it’s more like a reflection of your experience(s), your past and things you did in your past. Making changes to your techniques, pitches, scripts, reading books, taking on more education may provide some relief, but not for long and it won’t last. You’ll get all pumped and motivated by the new technique, tip or lesson you learned, only to realize that once the excitement is over, you revert back to the old, predictable you.
And here’s my answer to you. If you want to REWRITE the future of your career, business, and/or any relationship in your life - CREATE a blank space that you can make a DECLARATION into using FUTURE-based LANGUAGE. Otherwise, you can't create a future on top of the one that already exists - your predictable future. Carefully evaluate your past (take your time here, it’s the most crucial part), look at it authentically, and then determine your core values and beliefs. Start taking actions that you’ve never taken before, doing things you’ve never done, talking to people you’ve never talked to, experiencing things you’ve never experienced, i.e. crafting a path that is no longer PREDICTABLE. The path that is not based on what you already know, how you see and experience things. You already know what your predictable future looks like. If you really want to interrupt the predictable, commit yourself to dropping the past judgments, experiences, opinions, reasons, and considerations. Start looking at things and situations newly, beyond your own opinion and perception, put yourself into other person’s shoes. Set yourself up to win and to create.
When things get hard again (and they sure will), don’t fall into the same traps of the past (the predictable); act differently, newly, unreasonably; be patient, be persistent and for once experience a breakthrough in performance and causing your own, new outcomes. When you get discouraged (and you sure will be), when “I CAN’T” shows up, when doubt lurks in - don’t fall into the old traps, don’t quit and trust the process. Be patient and act differently, power through, show grit, ask for advice, talk to people, keep your mind open to new ideas and ways of looking at things. Leave all of the baggage you’ve been carrying on your shoulders all this time. Stop crafting your future based on how your life WAS. Craft it based on what you DECLARE it to be RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW and get PRESENT.
The good news is that the moment you put your past to where it belongs, the future becomes a clean slate and you get to say how it’s going to be. Will it be easy to do that? No. If it was easy - you’d already
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